The Day I Turned 26 (Plus Six)


I turned 32 on Saturday.

Friday night, Eddie and I had a conversation that went something like this:

E: So, do you feel 32?
Me: Um, I'm not 32 YET.* But, no, I don't.  I feel 19.
E: Oh, you do not.

Then he proceeded to tell me that I still look like in my 20's and I agreed with him with the exception of the lines around my eyes and he said, "well, if you'd just gain a little bit of weight, it would fill those wrinkles in."

I'm not sure whether to be flattered by the inference that I'm skeeeeny or annoyed by the fact that he did not say something like, "What lines around your eyes?"

* I had to lay the smack down on Facebook Friday afternoon because people kept telling me "Happy Birthday."  I was all, "bitch, please, I still got 12 hours left of being 31.  LET ME HOLD ON A LITTLE BIT LONGER."

So, anyway, for the most part I do feel 19.  Or like I should still be 19.  Sometimes the fact that I'm in my 30's, have three children, pay a mortgage . . . it all kind of blows my mind.  You see, I don't so much have a problem with 32.  Nice, round number.  Sounds pretty great.  My problem lies with the fact that I am far too young to actually be 32.  And, also, I still struggle with, you know, it not being the 1990's anymore.
While I do feel like I should still be 19, I have to admit that I apparently do not actuallly feel 19.  This is evidenced by two things:

1) I went out Saturday night and was back home and in bed by 11:30. 
2) I woke up Sunday morning and felt like I'd been hit by a truck.  My entire body HURT.  It still hurts a little today.  Dubya Tee Eff?

The originial birthdy plan had been to hit up the BBQ fest that's part of the Memphis in May celebration.  Well, if we're going to get technical, the original plan was to win a few grand on a scratch-off ticket and spend the weekend baking myself in the sun on a beach in Florida.  But since that didn't happen, BBQ fest it was.


We got downtown, walked 90340922094 blocks from our parking spot to Tom Lee Park (just in case you wanted to know, last year at this time Tom Lee Park was under water.  I think, this year, it's rained perhaps twice in the past three months).  Before we could pay to get in to the festival, we overheard a group of people talking about how much it "sucked."  We stopped and talked to them and basically found out that it just  You pay $9 just to get in to the festival, there was no BBQ to sample, and all the food they did have was overpriced.  Not coo'.

So, instead, we settled on some Gus's World Famous Fried Chicken (quite simply the best fried chicken in the world).  And beer.  And air conditioning.  (It was 95* in Memphis on Saturday).

I'm goinig to do you the favor of NOT blowing up this picture any larger.  32 years old and had a GINORMOUS pimple pop up on my chin.  I told Storme yesterday that it looked like Rudolph decided to plunk his nose down on my chin.

After Gus's, it was Beale Street.

I have to have a Walk Me Down every year when I celebrate my birthday.  Have to.
That blue thing?  It's a Walk Me Down!

My hobbies include writing, reading, shopping, and bullshitting with random strangers.  Oh man.  I love random people.

I also love Jello shots.

Back to random people.  Here are just a few of the peeps we enjoyed BS'ing with:

My goal was to convince each of these people that I was only turning 26.
And also that I was half Filipina.

We also happened to run into these guys:

They were fabulous and fun and it's really a shame that none of them actually live in Memphis because we would teee-otally be besties if they did.  We spent five hours on Beale Street with them.

Once they found out it was my birthday, Storme and I did not pay for anything the rest of the night.  They even ordered me a birthday brownie a la mode at one of the places we went into.

The best thing about hanging with a group of gay guys -- other than the fact that they constantly tell you your beautiful - is that you don't have to worry that they're trying to get in your pants.  It's all just good, Jello-shot laden fun.

It was such a great birthday!  If the rest of my 32's go the same as the kick-off, then it's gonna be a GREAT year!
Please go on ahead and excuse the melting face and messy hair.  95 degrees, people!

P.S. and TOTALLY unrelated: Today is the first day of summer vacation.  PRAY FOR ME.
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