Thursday Things


1) Eddie and I love - love - Texas de Brazil.  All you can eat meat with a "salad" bar that's out of this world -- what's not to love?  I got an email a couple weeks ago that they were doing a special MLK Day lunch.  Eddie and I talked about it and decided to go and pass along the our love to the kids.  Diet?  What diet?  I called to make a reservation and they were completely booked.  Boo. I figured that was God's, the universe's, or TDB's way of telling me lay off the steak, fatty.  THEN the lady on the phone told me they were extending the offer for Wednesday and Thursday.  So I figured that was God's, the universe's, or TBD's way of telling me go for it, fatty.

Kyan, who is my resident Very Picky Eater, threw down.  The boy ate two plates of rice, three pieces of chicken wrapped in bacon (my favorite too!), two pieces of steak, a piece of Brazillian sausage, a slice of lamb, and I don't know how much bacon.  He even told us he wants to go back there for his birthday!

Obviously, this little trip to TdB wasn't on my diet.  I might be griping - and threatening to hurl my scale at the wall - come Friday morning but, for today, it was worth it!

I Keep it Real

2) One of my favorite things about the My Fitness Pal app is that after you are done logging in for the day, it will give you an idea of how much you could possibly weigh in five weeks if you ate the same way every single day.  I later changed the 10,000 calories to a more reasonable guesstimate but before I did that I just had to have a look at what it would be if I ate 10,000+ calories every day for the next five weeks:

In FIVE WEEKS???  That's a very big weight gain.  Holy crap!

3) Apparently there is a reality show being shopped around to networks called Heavy Housewives of Memphis.  I'm a little irritated about this.  Partly because they put "heavy" in the title.  Partly because I dropped the whole "housewives of Memphis" thing in a blog title TWO YEARS AGO and did anyone bother to ask ME to be on it?  Noooo.  Apparently reality networks are (still) not too interested in watching me yell at my kids and browse Pinterest for projects that are never going to get done. 

By the way -- "Real Housewives of Memphis" is the number one search phrase people Google to find my blog.

4) I picked up a prescription at Target on Friday.  After the pharmacist gave me the spill on the prescript he told me, "Call if you have any questions.  I mean it.  Call me."  Okay.  I was back in Target on Monday and the same pharmacist walked past me in the soap aisle.  He spoke and even called me by name.  This was in Target -- not some neighborhood, mom & pop type of pharmacy.  I think he mighta wanted him a little bit of Brandi! 

5) Has anyone watched the new show Are You There, Chelsea?  I love Chelsea Handler but this show sucks.  Also, Laura Prepon will always be Donna Pinciotti.  Always.

6) You'd think that by the time your third child reaches the Terrible Two's stage you'd be all "yeah, yeah, whatever.  Been thurrr, done that."  You'd be wrong.  And what makes it even worse is that by the time you're on your third child then you KNOW.  You know that the Terrible Two's start at just-before-they-turn-two and last until age five.

Karis never ceases to amaze me.  She climbs on everything.  I moved the kitchen chairs where she can't get to them and . . . she still manages to get to them.  She is also in the Nakey Toddler Stage.  Every time I turn around, she's shucking her diaper.  I've even tried duct tapinig it on (relax, no tape on her skin) and guess what?  Houdini Baby GOT IT OFF ANYWAY. 

7) I will be in New Orleans three weeks from tomorrow.  Three weeks!  I have a list of everything I need to do before I leave.  It looks like this:
  • Go to a parade
  • Eat beignets
  • Eat crawfish bisque from the French Market
  • Eat a po' boy
  • Eat my weight in pralines
  • Eat alligator.  Lots and lots of alligator
  • Eat crab stuffed mushrooms (my favorite from last year!)
  • Eat a muffaletta
  • Eat at Mother's
75% of my budget is reserved for food.

8) A friend posted this on Facebook yesterday.  I seriously LOL'd.  If you've ever been pregnant then oh you sooooo get it.

9) My idol.  She has diabetes.


Also, errbody needs to go on ahead and BACK OFF my Paula.  Yes, her food gives you di-a-beet-us.  But she ain't forcin' you to eat it, hon! 

10) Did I mention I'll be in New Orleans THREE WEEKS from tomorrow?  Oh, baby.
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